Unhurry with Rachna: I love the way you are possessive about me

I love the way you are possessive about me.

You let me be me, and what I feel comfortable with.

Clothes don’t make me, me. But the freedom to choose does.

And I choose. Half a shoulder showing here, half my legs free in the Bombay sun.

And your smile of wonder. The wonder of us.

I love the way you are possessive about me

Not asking me to conform.

Or behave in a particular way when I am in public

Or talk to men differently from women or other genders 

When I express myself publicly, 

You stand like a rock right next to me

I love the way you are possessive about me.

Your possessiveness surfaces in endearing ways

Saving that mineral bottle for me so no one takes it

Ensuring I take my supplements in the evenings, 

So with my autoimmune condition, my immunity is good.

Playing our favourite music when we go for a drive

So my heart sings our unique song 

I love the way you are possessive about me.

Because you show it with love

Not with restriction, control or ego.

Possessiveness is love, not control

Those who try to control our behaviour

Feel traumatised when they have no control

Feel incomplete without the power to control others

They may need treatment

Like we all do 

When the body gets sick, we go to a doctor

There is treatment

When the mind gets sick too

As for us

I love the way you are possessive about me.

In booking my favourite place

And asking the restaurant to help with my food restrictions 

While conspiring with the DJ so he can play my favourite song

Possessiveness is love, not control

So let go. Live, and let live.

Penned down after Deepika Padukone was trolled for Pathan. It’s sad that the feeling of control and importance of the conscience keepers of our country comes from a professional actor just doing her role.


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