Why I Hate Valentine’s Day

Do you find yourself dreading Valentine’s Day, the celebrations, the chocolate, seeing other happy couples, etc? It can be so hard to feel happy or see other happy people when you’re struggling so deeply with food and body image issues.

I want to encourage you to love yourself and celebrate this Valentine’s Day – whether you’re in a relationship or not. Sometimes the best thing that we can do for ourselves when we’re struggling, is to do small things that bring us joy. And even when we’re not feeling joyful or happy or “in the mood,” it can be very helpful to push ourselves to celebrate, to do something fun/different, or to be intimate with ourselves or our partners.

If food is a struggle for you this Valentine’s Day, first of all, you are NOT alone. But, I also want to give you permission to eat the damn chocolate. You are ALLOWED to enjoy food and eat foods that you love. So if you love chocolate and your partner gifted you chocolate, enjoy it! If you love chocolate and you are single, treat yourself to your favourite kind of chocolate! Allow yourself to eat, enjoy, and put the guilt and shame to the side for the day. Sometimes stepping out of your comfort zone, allowing yourself to enjoy foods you wouldn’t normally, and giving yourself some grace and permission can be so therapeutic.

Another therapeutic exercise, if you struggle with food this Valentine’s Day, is to cook a special meal. Whether you cook with your partner or your best friends or by yourself while watching your favourite movie, cooking a special meal can be satiating and enjoyable. It doesn’t have to be fancy and it doesn’t have to contain foods that are hard for you to allow yourself to enjoy. But spending time preparing your food and pouring love into your meal can be very cathartic when it comes to struggles with food. It can also be a really fun, spicy activity to do with your partner in the kitchen! Feel free to put on melodious music, a romantic movie, or turn it into a stripping game. Anything that allows you to enjoy food and enjoy your body this Valentine’s Day.

Lastly, I know that when you struggle with food and body image Valentine’s Day or any day can be hard when it comes to loving and accepting your body. It can be hard to love yourself and be intimate with yourself if you don’t have a partner, and it can be hard to feel comfortable and confident in your body and be present in intimacy if you have a partner. If this is a struggle for you, have grace and compassion for yourself. It is OKAY to struggle with this, and you are not alone. Do what you need to do in order to feel sexy, confident, and free. If that looks like candles and low lighting, sexy lingerie, blindfolded, a kickass outfit, fake eyelashes/spray tan, etc., do what helps YOU feel good in your own skin. And know that you are worthy of feeling good in your skin.

Happy Valentine’s Day, loves. You are so so loved and SO worth it. Believe that today!

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