Unhurry with Rachna: Lock Me Up

Until a year ago

We could run away from each and still be together

And for many years, be called husband and wife

But the corners closed in and there is nowhere to run

The planes have stopped

The trains have halted

The cafes we used

As an escape route, have been quarantined

We are forced to confront our empty lives

And the truths we covered as husband and wife

Now that we stay under the same roof

With no escape, our life is proof

That the conflicts we bear, are stirring up

The resolution we had

To stay together

Under the pretence of happiness

Are becoming difficult to continue, as husband and wife

This situation is here

For a year more, or two

So we need to start talking

About things ugly and light, with this view

Because our relationship depends on the conversations

We have as husband and wife

I was inspired to write a small poem that reflects the state of being in the pandemic. With the number of conflict cases I am getting, have you ever wondered why couples and families, which had an amazing chance to huddle and cuddle together during the lockdown, are exhibiting cracks in their relationships?

It’s because people have lost their me-time. And because earlier, a conflict was dealt with deflection. Don’t want to address an unpleasant issue? Call people over. Feeling stifled? Let’s plan a holiday. Confronting, acknowledging the unresolved issues was uncomfortable because it could demonstrate that the relationship had reached an uncomfortable turn. Where, maybe, instead of growing together, you walked on parallel paths that began going in divergent directions. And because we had excuses of people over, café hangouts, getaways to hide behind, no one talked.

Peeps, just talk. Talk to him about wanting to break away one a day week because you’re overwhelmed being a mother and wife, and want to just celebrate being a woman.

Talk to her. About wanting to plan your game of golf alone, even if you can’t go to the course, because that gives you peace and doesn’t make you a bad father, son or husband. You just need that me time to celebrate a passion no one else at home understands.

Talk to the kids. They miss their friends, their previous life. And they are scared, because for the first time, they are seeing their parents as conflicted. When they were in school, both parents seemed like a composite unit of comfort. Today, dad loses his cool. Mom falls ill often. And both yell at the kids. Often.

Talk. To yourself. The lockdown is here to stay another year. Your family shouldn’t crumble under the confinities of the walls of your home, a place you built with love.

Just. Talk.

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